My rough ride to self-confidence.

The beginning of junior year, my application for National Honor Society had been sent in over a month ago, all I needed was that one letter saying, "Congratulations." I got myself all worked up, thinking I had no chance of not being accepted, that I would be lighting a candle the following week, but my whole world turned on me.

I was visiting my sister in Louisiana, the day was hot and muggy, my friend had texted me saying she was accepted. Immediately I called my grandmother, begging her to open the letter. I was on the phone while helping my sister and brother in law set up their Christmas tree; hanging red ornaments and spreading sparkle all over the house. Then, the words came out of my grandma's mouth, "You were not accepted." I fell to the couch, my tears fell like a waterfall and my phone tumbled on to the ground. I cried for hours on hours on hours. My last day in Louisiana ruined by one letter, one sentence, "You were not accepted."

For days I cried, not understanding why I was not accepted. I questioned my abilities, my grades, my leadership, my life. I felt embarrassed to show up to school, all of my friends had been accepted, they all celebrated without me; I was ashamed. I couldn't help but question, why? I refused to apply senior year, not wanting to feel the pure torture I felt the first time of rejection, but then I realized something.

Okay, I was not accepted. What can I do to improve and be accepted? That question that I believed was impossible to actually answer, was possible. NHS claimed that I was not a leader; I got involved in Step Up and got TRAINED to be a leader. NHS said I needed more extra-curricular activities; I joined yearbook club, decided to run for class officer and got involved in activities outside of school. NHS made me believe that I was not good enough, but I am good enough.

Not being accepted to NHS seemed like my worst nightmare, but it actually helped me to grow. I learned that if someone puts me down, or if something puts me down, they can only knock me over, not keep me down. I need to keep my head up, strive to prove them wrong and fight for what I want. Never give up on yourself, because you are worth it. I learned it the hard way, but it is true; you are worth it.

http://www.nhs.us/